Your new book makes me feel even more sorry for you than the first chapter of Harry Potter. I had really hoped all that money you have now would make you less... broken, bitter and contemptuous of every human being you've ever met. At least success hasn't filled up up with self-involved ennui like rappers bitching about their friends and families ( Read more... )

But I really want to read a nice Entourage crossover where Vince has sex with Jensen Ackles, who he is introduced to by Jessica Alba, of course!

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Any time you need a blowjob, man, just look me up. I don't even care if by the time you get down to my name on the enormous list of people offering to blow you you're like 78-years-old and have no teeth and need like a handful of Viagra first, I'm there. And then my brother-in-law says he's next on his knees. His wife, my little sister, doesn't ( Read more... )

You are brilliant and I love you. Girls is the best show I have ever seen, despite not having a single guy I would fuck blind drunk in the cast, and I am deeply shallow that way. I never once watched Sex in the City and even for a moment related to any of those women, and I won't even mention the tragically 2-dimensional female characters in the ( Read more... )

Because, you know, Kirk as a spy. I have thoughts, sadly first among them that Reese Witherspoon reminds me too much of my sister to be a viable sex object, and second among them that McG is totally, totally gay, totally, totally hilarious, and totally, totally incapable of writing a heterosexual romance. Because of being totally, totally gay. ( Read more... )

I really feel like there should be a Words with Friends Fest where everyone plays 2 games of Words with friends, takes a screen cap of the completed game, submit it, and then everyone gets someone else's board and you write a story containing all the words on the board. It would be totally awesome. Someone should hook that up.

I officially don't care anymore.

You couldn't even make it through your second episode without violating your own premiss? Color me unimpressed.

All I have to say is that I just want to pat Steve on the back and tell him that Danny is a dumbass and will come back to him some day. Poor little sailor. They repeal DADT and he still doesn't get to make out with Danny on the dock when his ship pulls into port.

I do not care how queerly attractive you are, I will never watch Atonement again as it hurt my soul as much as my brief fixation with Orson Scott Card novels. Really, I feel it was particularly cruel of you to be so pretty in a tuxedo.

Yours,
A reluctant admirer